Indian Food Relationship status: It's Complicated.

 As I have traveled across the world, the one thing I know for sure is food is what defines a culture. It is one of the first things you notice when you visit and one of the first things you miss from home. Food is what creates comfort and normalcy in our life and without familiar food, it is difficult to feel content in the long term. 

I've written extensively about my complicated relationship with Indian food.  Growing up in a typical Midwestern US home, food items served and available to me were hearty and tasty, but not overly seasoned or spicy. I enjoy the wide variety of options of American food and although I have some aversions, I consider myself a pretty typical eater.

My first exposure to Indian food was very late in life, after meeting my husband. He cooked a few items for me that I found delicious and others that I took home and threw away. He was excited to share his cultural foods with me and as most Americans, I was exposed to the more 'restaurant-style' foods which are not regularly eaten in India except on special occasions.  I always share the story that my husband told me that as a kid, they would only eat Chicken once a week max. This is pretty hard to fathom, but after learning more about the food that is typically eaten in India, I can now see how that is true.

Many of our trips to India have been with the purpose of a wedding or holiday where large groups of family members are visiting.  It is typical during these times to hire a cook to prepare the food outside or on the rooftop.  I was intrigued by this idea when I first learned this is what was going to happen, and spent time watching the process during my early visits.  The food they typically cook is rice, lentils, and a vegetable curry mixture.  Everyone seems quite satisfied to eat it day after day and it is served in large quantities and typically eaten with your right hand scooped directly into your mouth.

While I have partaken in these meals numerous times, on this visit I have been challenged by the healthy food journey I started in July.  It always seems a bit confusing for my Indian relatives how I am not overly interested in eating these items or even more so on this visit as I tried to explain that food high in carbs are not something I am eating. They react with the same curiosity as one would feel when trying to understand what an exotic animal eats, which is both entertaining and dehumanizing at the same time.  I appreciate all the concern for my well-being, but being singled out so often is difficult in terms of trying to fit in and I find that disappearing at eating time is generally the best remedy.

This trip I didn't experience the deep sadness I've felt and written about in the past related to food. I think this is mainly because I have become accustomed to eating less and brought along some protein-rich packaged foods to hold me over.  There are a few American-type restaurants like McDonalds or Dominos Pizza that can be used to fill in gaps, but often times the items available are just strange enough to be unappealing. (Pizza with corn on it 😣)

I'm not sure that I will ever make peace with my Indian food aversions and likely need to surrender to the life as an exotic animal whose eating habits are neither clear or understood.  I've decided after 15 years that this isn't a battle I'll ever win or wish to compete in. It's somewhere that I just need to be me and let everyone just keep their hands away from the cage. 

The cooks outside the house. In an entertaining language exchange I somehow misunderstood that one of the cooks was the brother of the deceased grandfather, which I felt was a strange task for an elder relative. I found out later he was the brother of the original cook, not a family member.

I snuck this picture outside of the living room window where they cook. This was goat curry day, which I did eat some of!

A few dining pictures.Shivali is my new sacrificial lamb when it comes to eating. 

One of my favorite things about India is all the little shops right outside that are an easy walk to look for acceptable snack items.  I didn't eat much this trip, but this Winkie guy knows what he is doing. These were delish!