It's difficult to evaluate how 'true' of an Indian experience I have while I'm here. Compared to other foreigners, one could argue that I go rather extreme. Only once did I stay in a hotel here, the other 8 or so times I always stayed in the family home accompanied by 5-50 of our closest Indian relatives. All with varying degrees of English speaking skills, all the way from rather fluent to nod and smile.
I've done most of the Indian cultural things at least once and lots of things I have done numerous times. I've rode in an auto rickshaw, used an Indian style toilet, ate with my hand, visited ancient temples, touched elder's feet for blessings, wore a sari, blurted in line, slept on the floor next to relatives I only just met. Having done all these things, does this qualify me as truly experiencing the culture?
We went to a big mall today, from the inside if you remove all the Indian people and ethnic clothing, you wouldn't really know you were in India. There was a McDonald's (granted there are no cheeseburgers) and a Burger King and a KFC. They sell jewelry, shoes and clothes you can see anywhere else in the world. Our first stop at the mall- TGI Fridays. I didn't ask to go, but my dear husband knew I likely wanted to go, so didn't ask if we should go or not, he just led the way. I know at some level I disappoint him by not being that keen on eating the food that everyone else in the house is eating- Rice, Dal, and some curry made of various vegetables. It is cooked everyday and everyone eats it everyday. I have yet to eat this. Part of me wants to try harder and just work to fit in better, and the other part of me wants to just scream all the way to McDonald's. It's a hard emotion to explain. How difficult would it be for me to just eat it once a day to make everyone happy? Will this make them happy? Do they care either way? I actually have no idea and I know they would never tell me.
Part of the confusion in being here is reading people. What are their true intentions and true feelings. They are good at masking over it and making things seem unimportant when they really are important. There is also a lot of hidden meaning and body language that I probably miss along the way, although I generally consider myself rather intuitive when it comes to these things.
Overall, when I look back on all the times I have visited India, I would be hard pressed to find another American who has done these things as frequently, diligently, or nearly as adeptly as I have. For the most part I am proud of that, not because I was forced to do it, but because I found a spot in my soul to welcome it and conform where I could while still maintaining who I am. I could probably be criticized for not going as far as I could have or should have. I can imagine there are others who eat the food everyday and follow all the rituals and enjoy the festivals more, but at the end of the day that isn't what makes or breaks me. For me, it is about taking in the experience and opening my mind and my life to the opportunity of viewing the world just a little bit differently. I've seen so many things, more than I could ever describe here which has altered my mind and my perception of good and bad, dirty and clean, safe and risky, and happy and sad. How could I possibly regret those experiences by not feeling like I did enough?
As I sit in this back bedroom under a blaring fan sipping my ultra ice water, just outside my window I can hear the roar of traffic and wild street dogs barking and smell the neighbors cooking their dinner I do feel fused with the culture at some level- at my level. Yes, it will be something I will always pursue and no I will probably never prefer India over Wisconsin but I can confirm that at this time and in this space I am at peace with how it is.
I've done most of the Indian cultural things at least once and lots of things I have done numerous times. I've rode in an auto rickshaw, used an Indian style toilet, ate with my hand, visited ancient temples, touched elder's feet for blessings, wore a sari, blurted in line, slept on the floor next to relatives I only just met. Having done all these things, does this qualify me as truly experiencing the culture?
We went to a big mall today, from the inside if you remove all the Indian people and ethnic clothing, you wouldn't really know you were in India. There was a McDonald's (granted there are no cheeseburgers) and a Burger King and a KFC. They sell jewelry, shoes and clothes you can see anywhere else in the world. Our first stop at the mall- TGI Fridays. I didn't ask to go, but my dear husband knew I likely wanted to go, so didn't ask if we should go or not, he just led the way. I know at some level I disappoint him by not being that keen on eating the food that everyone else in the house is eating- Rice, Dal, and some curry made of various vegetables. It is cooked everyday and everyone eats it everyday. I have yet to eat this. Part of me wants to try harder and just work to fit in better, and the other part of me wants to just scream all the way to McDonald's. It's a hard emotion to explain. How difficult would it be for me to just eat it once a day to make everyone happy? Will this make them happy? Do they care either way? I actually have no idea and I know they would never tell me.
Part of the confusion in being here is reading people. What are their true intentions and true feelings. They are good at masking over it and making things seem unimportant when they really are important. There is also a lot of hidden meaning and body language that I probably miss along the way, although I generally consider myself rather intuitive when it comes to these things.
Overall, when I look back on all the times I have visited India, I would be hard pressed to find another American who has done these things as frequently, diligently, or nearly as adeptly as I have. For the most part I am proud of that, not because I was forced to do it, but because I found a spot in my soul to welcome it and conform where I could while still maintaining who I am. I could probably be criticized for not going as far as I could have or should have. I can imagine there are others who eat the food everyday and follow all the rituals and enjoy the festivals more, but at the end of the day that isn't what makes or breaks me. For me, it is about taking in the experience and opening my mind and my life to the opportunity of viewing the world just a little bit differently. I've seen so many things, more than I could ever describe here which has altered my mind and my perception of good and bad, dirty and clean, safe and risky, and happy and sad. How could I possibly regret those experiences by not feeling like I did enough?
As I sit in this back bedroom under a blaring fan sipping my ultra ice water, just outside my window I can hear the roar of traffic and wild street dogs barking and smell the neighbors cooking their dinner I do feel fused with the culture at some level- at my level. Yes, it will be something I will always pursue and no I will probably never prefer India over Wisconsin but I can confirm that at this time and in this space I am at peace with how it is.
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